It’s our anniversary! Can you believe that is has been nine whole years since we said “I Do?” So many things have happened in those years and even though all of them haven’t been good, I am still grateful for each and every experience. I have taken the last few days to do a lot of reflection on our life together and I marvel at how much has changed and yet how much has stayed the same. I think about the day we got married: fresh faced and completely ignorant to the magnitude of what we were doing. All we knew was that we were in love and desperate to be near each other. It’s crazy to think about! I loved you then with a passion that still today seems unreal. It was unlike anything I had ever felt in my life and even though I was only 21 years old, I knew that I didn’t want to ever lose that feeling. It’s never easy to love after you have been hurt, it’s never easy to love after you’ve been lied to and mistreated. It’s hard to trust when people who are supposed to love you and care for you, mistreat you. I have been wary of people for my entire life and always trusted with both eyes open and with as minimal expectation as possible. But you walked into my life and turned it completely upside down; I was winded by your honesty and genuine love for me. Even though I tried to push you away, you wouldn’t go. I could see the sincerity in your eyes, those eyes that speak to me without saying a single word. You erased every single insecurity, you never let me voice my self doubt. You made a world for me where I finally felt comfortable and secure. You created a safe haven for me, you shielded me from myself and you have always been my greatest protector. I knew then, as I know now, that you would always be there for me, would give your last to see me smile. I can’t tell you how that makes me feel because there aren’t words to describe it.
Our life together has been a whirlwind. Babies, holidays, in-laws, fights, tears, happiness but always on top of everything, an earth shattering realness. I have never had to be guarded with you, never had to worry about what I say or even what I look like. Communicating with you is probably the easiest thing I have ever done; you know what I am thinking, what I am feeling before I say a word. It’s always been us in a private joke, oblivious to the world around us. Your arms are still my favorite place to be. Your kisses still light my body on fire and even the faintest of touches can send spine arching shivers through my body. My body bows to your command and it is the most exhilarating and liberating feeling in the world. You make me feel so alive and I have come to revel in that feeling. I look at you now, very much a man, and I am amazed at how you’ve changed. Every year you grow more handsome, more confident, more commanding. You own who you are now and what could be sexier? There is no trace of the boy I married, replaced instead with a man with years of life experience and loves me in a way that some can’t even dream about. It has never been lost me how lucky I am to have you. You give me freedom, you support every single thing I do. You are always behind me 100% and you always give me all of you. You make taking care of our beautiful family your main priority. Our kids have enviable lives and you make that possible…sacrificing sleep and everything else so that no one in this house will ever want for anything…you amaze me every single day.
On our 9th wedding anniversary, I just want you to know that I love you. I love you more than I did that day I stood across from you in ill fitting pants with a stuffy nose and a heart full of happiness. You are easy to love and despite everything, despite any doubts, despite any obstacles and perhaps in spite of them, I will continue loving you. There will never be a me without you. You’re it for me. You have always been…my happily ever after.
Happy Anniversary Baby.
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